How to Handle Your Emotions

It's important to know how to handle your emotions when co-parenting. If you are emotional and react to something your co-parent says or does, it can negatively impact your children.

Let's start with how hard this experience is. It’s difficult to understand how it feels, unless you’ve been through it.

You’re grieving so many losses, the loss of your intact family, time with your children, your in-laws, friends, your home and more.

It’s normal to feel lost and overwhelmed.

However, healing is possible.

Here are some strategies to help you heal and emotionally recover when you're going through a divorce:

1. Allow yourself time to process your feelings.

Give yourself time to process the feelings. Be gentle with yourself and understand that you're grieving and that it takes time to grieve.

Don’t make any important decisions or changes right away.

Find a way to express your feelings that feels right to you. Therapy, a support group and journaling are all good options.

2. Take care of yourself physically and mentally.

Divorce can take a toll on your overall well-being — so it's essential to focus on getting enough sleep, eating right and exercising regularly.

Spending time in nature walking or hiking can help you get a new perspective.

Meditation can help you improve sleep, decrease stress and have clearer thinking.

3. Practice forgiveness and letting go.

Holding onto anger and bitterness can hinder your healing process.

While it may be difficult, practicing forgiveness can be transformative.

This doesn't mean forgetting or condoning the hurtful actions that occurred — but rather freeing yourself from the emotional burden and allowing yourself to move forward.

“Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.” — Buddha

Holding onto anger is only hurting you.

Find a way to process your anger — talking to a therapist, join a support group or surround yourself with supportive friends and family.

Read one of these books:

"Getting Past Your Breakup: How to Turn a Devastating Loss into the Best Thing That Ever Happened to You" by Susan J. Elliott

"Moving Forward After Divorce: Practical Steps to Healing Your Hurts, Finding Fresh Perspective, Managing Your New Life" by David & Lisa Frisbie

"It’s Not You: Identifying and Healing from Narcissistic People" by Romani Durvasula

Rebuilding your life after divorce offers an opportunity for a fresh start.

Envision what you want your future to look like. Set goals, explore new possibilities, and create a vision for your future life.

If you can embrace this chance to reinvent yourself, you can create a life that can be better than you’ve ever imagined!

What is Co-Parenting?

Co-parenting is the process where both parents work together to raise their children despite living apart. Effective co-parenting requires communication, cooperation, and consistency. Here are some key strategies and resources that can help you maintain a positive co-parenting relationship.

Helpful Tips for Effective Co-Parenting:

• Focus on the Children’s Needs: Prioritize the emotional and physical well-being of your children above any personal conflicts.
• Create a Structured Parenting Plan: A clear parenting plan outlines time-sharing schedules, decision-making responsibilities, and communication rules.
• Keep Communication Open: Regularly communicate with your ex-spouse to discuss your children’s needs, whether it’s related to school, health, or activities.
• Stay Consistent: Consistency in rules and expectations across both households helps children feel secure.

Supporting Your Children Through Divorce

Children often face emotional challenges when parents divorce. It’s essential to offer consistent reassurance and a stable environment to support their well-being.

Helpful Strategies for Helping Children Cope:

• Validate Their Emotions: Let your children express their feelings and reassure them that it’s okay to be sad or confused.
• Maintain Routines: Keeping regular routines for meals, bedtime, and school will help children feel secure and in control.
• Listen Actively: Be present and listen to what your children are saying. Encourage open discussions, but don’t force them to talk if they’re not ready.
• Avoid Blame: Do not speak negatively about your ex-spouse in front of the children. This encourages a healthy relationship with both parents.